December 17, 2019
They’ve already effectively outlawed BB guns and making your fingers into the shape of a gun and pointing it at people. It was only a matter of time before they came for Nerf guns – which only really exist because they’ve banned all the other, more fun variants.
A consumer group in New York has asked toy maker Hasbro to stop selling “assault style” weapons — that fire foam Nerf darts.
The Empire State Consumer Project has written a letter to the Hasbro board of directors, saying “as the holidays approach, we are reminded of our mission to protect the safety of children.”
“As we watch holiday toy commercials, we see the Nerf Ultra One and other extreme Nerf machine guns for children and are reminded of mass shootings that have devastated American children and families for decades now. In these times, the TV ad for this product plays like a Saturday Night Live parody, except that it is not at all funny,” said the Dec. 3 letter.
We all know that mass shooters are inspired by Nerf guns. Especially in the inner cities.
Nerf guns have led to the death of more inner-city youths than any other contributing factor. This is known. More than anything though, this recent outrage is about making sure the kids don’t have any fun or engage in masculine pursuits.
“It’s a matter of this being a very vulnerable consumer group. Children buy what they see and we’re not sure this is driven by market demand for assault weapon toys by children or the industry creating the demand,” said the letter, written by Carol Chittenden, director of the Project, and Judy Braiman, president of the group.
“When your products themselves violate most of your proclaimed corporate values, something is very wrong. How does promoting play with huge automatic weapons create joy, creativity and connection around the world, and across generations, and make the world a better place for children? How do these weapon products use your business as a force for good? Who would this child be shooting with his cache of assault weapons?”
We kind of already know the answer to that.
“In one of the most creative industries on earth, how does one of the country’s largest toy producers fall so short in coming up with innovative toys that spark the peace-filled imaginations of children? If your research shows that children are craving toy assault weapons, you have missed the mark. Parents will tell you that many are afraid of going to school because of the stories they see and hear when a school shooting occurs. Surely, those of you who are parents understand,” the letter says.
The Jews are terrified of the goyim nurturing a healthy fighting instinct. They are also trying to nip the masculine and American desire to own firearms in the bud, to get the kids to think weapons are bad and to be compliant soy-munching slaves.
That doesn’t mean that Nerf guns are any good though.
They always get jammed, they don’t shoot far and you always lose the little darts. Laser tag and paintball are far superior. Paintball in particular is just straight-up war training – which is why I’m shocked that so few right-wingers do it.
Besides, every paintball field I’ve ever been to has been run by a chain-smoking redneck with fun stories to tell.
You know, if I wanted to hang out and have fun with frens, I’d just start a paintball club instead of sitting around drunk and angry all day listening to podcasts.
The benefits of paintball are too numerous to even list, but I will try:
- Fantastic exercise (short explosive sprints)
- Outside in nature (getting out of the office)
- Overcoming the fear of being shot at (first couple of times you’re scared because it feels like a real warzone)
- Learning basic fireteam tactics (“Cover me! I’m going for it!”)
- Group bonding (self-explanatory)
I don’t care about Nerf guns, but I see the slippery slope here.
First they come for our Nerf guns, then they come for our laser tag and then they take away our paintball. They need to be stopped before they get anywhere close to that. Someone need to get the NRA on the line.
They shall NOT infringe on Nerf guns!