April 27, 2018
Oh, Gen Z. Your generation will produce the greatest comedians of all time.
Can you imagine being denied your glorious prom ceremony over a mere joke? Why not behead him, while they’re at it?
Prom night is a man’s most important coming of age event – kind of like how Spartans would get their sons to go hunting peasants in order to prove they were worthy to become men. Except modern society is way more gay, so instead of killing people, we send them out to party, get drunk and fuck sluts, preparing them for the rigors of modern adulthood.
Without his prom night, this young man will be lost – his life forever destroyed.
All for a little joke.
A Florida high school student whose offensive “promposal” went viral for all the wrong reasons won’t be going to prom or graduation.
Really hits you right in the feels. Like and share this article if you cried.
This past weekend, 18-year-old Noah Crowley, a student at Riverview High School in Sarasota, asked a fellow student to the prom via a Snapchat photo in which he held up a sign saying: “If I was black, I’d be picking cotton, but I’m white so I’m picking u 4 prom?”
Although the intended recipient sent Crowley a heart-eyed emoji, she may have to find another date.
This is definitely sadder than the ending of The Titanic.
Like, nigga, just get in the boat.
Instead of the two young lovers being separated by like, an inch of water, they’re kept apart by an evil Marxist institution hellbent on destroying the White race.
It would make an epic drama tbh.
Crowley’s parents released a statement to HuffPost on Tuesday afternoon saying their son will not be attending any school activities for the rest of the year:
“While our son has apologized himself, on behalf of our family, we wish to also express our most sincere apologies for the terrible words used in his ‘promposal.’
“We love our son dearly and know that he is a far better person than reflected in this reckless behavior. That said, as loving parents, we also feel compelled to share our own deep regret and serious concern about his actions.
“After numerous familial conversations and lengthy discussions with Riverview High School administrators, we have jointly agreed that our son will not be attending any further school activities or functions, including the Prom or graduation ceremony.
Oh, wow, so even his family cooperated with the school to ruin their son’s life and keep him apart from his prom waifu.
So we’ve got some Romeo and Juliet type scenario here on top of all this.
Wait, why is Leo in all these goddamn movies? I don’t want Leo playing Crowley in the future movie adaptation of this sad saga. It has to be Mel Gibson.
On Sunday, Crowley issued his own statement claiming he wanted “to sincerely apologize if I have offended anyone with the picture going around.”
Crowley’s apology didn’t get much support: One of his fellow students told him on Facebook, “Man save that apology … you meant what you posted!” according to local CBS affiliate WTSP.
Yeah, bud, apologies ain’t gonna get you nowhere. These people are thirsty for blood, and like sharks, giving them anything is only going to agitate them further.
You should probably sue the school for anti-White hate crimes instead. And also, sue your parents for being cuckolded faggots, which, while I’m no lawyer, I assume is some kind of crime.