November 6, 2015
In the midst of escalating international freedom and joy, pretty well all of it backlash from the Obama administration’s policy of funding global terrorism, Obama is focusing on what matters: a sports team name that allegedly hurts the feelings of Feather Indians.
The name of the Redskins is, after all, the main reason Indians haven’t developed their own civilization yet and instead just sit around and drink.
Obama solved the problems of there not being enough Blacks and Moslems in Europe by funding terrorists. He solved the problem of not being at war with Russia by funding terrorists.
The biggest problem for Obama right now is that this problem of a sports team name that hurts feather people’s feelings cannot be solved by funding terrorism.
The crisis throwing Obama into a whole new realm of confusion, as he considers bombing the stadium, or having the head of the NFL sodomized to death like he did to Colonel Gaddaffi.
To say the debate over the name of the Washington NFL franchise continues would be to assume that it remains on the front burner. For long stretches, it resides not just on the back burner, but on the other side of the kitchen from the stove.
I’m sorry, what?
That is an very convoluted metaphor.
For months, not much had been said about it. Now, in the days after the team filed a federal appeals court brief arguing that the trademark protection should be preserved because the United States Patent and Trademark Office has approved way more offensive and disparaging names, Adidas has offered to help high-school teams design uniforms not based on Native American nicknames — and the Commander in Chief once again has suggested that Daniel Snyder make a change.
“I don’t know if Adidas made the same offer to a certain NFL team here in Washington, but they might want to think about that as well,” Obama said, via TheHill.com.
Obama’s remarks came during a White House Tribal Nations Conference. He previously recommended consideration of a name change in 2013.
Obama is all about change. Regime changes, name changes, changes in the cost of health insurance premiums, changes in the murder rate, changes in the demographics of the country as well as your neighborhood, etc.
All of these changes have been mind-blowingly awesome, and so people are constantly demanding that Obama change everything else he hasn’t changed yet.
“If you’re living in a society that devalues your culture or perpetuates stereotypes, you may be devaluing yourself,” Obama said. “We all need to do more to ensure that our young people feel supported and respected.”
The question is, if this can’t be solved by bombings, assassinations and funding terrorism, how can it be solved? Maybe there is a way for Obama to incite mob violence against the team? That has always been his domestic ace-in-the-hole: using his position as a media personality to incite mob violence.
Surely, he’ll come up with something. He’s solved every problem so far by changing it.
This one goes out to the Cherokee Nation and their feelings.