June 10, 2018
As you may have noticed, I’ve been rereading the Dune series.
I haven’t read them in like, ten years. And I think that at least the first one it is the white man’s duty to read every 5 years.
Anyway, I was picturing Paul Muad’Dib as resembling Gary Numan, in my mind, while reading.
I think he fits better than any of the actors that have played him. Or any actor at all.
Of course he’s old now.
But speaking of him being old now.
Come to find out, he did a video more recently which appears to be about Dune.
It appears to be him as Paul talking to his sister Alia after he went into the desert to disappear into the spirit world.
And that video was released on his YouTube channel… on my 33rd birthday.
In other Dune news, the director of my favorite movie is making my favorite book into a movie.
I dunno how they’re giving him another major project after Blade Runner 2049 effectively flopped.
I have long held that it is impossible to make Dune into a movie. It’s too psychedelic and complicated. The only thing you could do is an anime. Seriously, you could do an anime. That is possible.
Maybe a Netflix series, I guess. But the first book couldn’t be told and make sense in fewer than 20 hours. Messiah 10 hours. Children 20 hours again.
So five seasons on Netflix.
But Netflix has to be pozzed and they would make the Fremen brown people and I just couldn’t handle that. There are no brown people in the Dune universe, because it is in space 20,000 years from now in distant space. And there just wouldn’t be any niggers at such a point. It is not possible. Asians maybe.
If the Fremen are gooks and the twins are the realization of hapa futurism…….. maybe I can be okay with that.
There could also be a subtle undercurrent that the Bene Gesserit don’t want a half-Fremen heir because they don’t want an Elliot Rodger.
But let’s be real here: it’s a story about white people, all the characters are white, and if it’s going to be filmed, all the character should be white (or weird alien beings).
But you’re just not allowed to do that anymore.
So I don’t see how, even with the best director on board, this movie could not be a complete attack on our childhoods yet again.
The Quebecano got Blade Runner made with the only colored person being a slave trader who lived in a trash dump.
So maybe Dune can be made as the white supremacist movie it is meant to be.
But the plot can’t make sense in 2.5 hours. No way. Been tried. Didn’t work. Cannot work.
Also… can it really be a movie anyway? Isn’t so much of the whole power of it the way you realize the world in your mind? And the psychedelic elements of visions of the future and different versions of the future… how do you translate that to film? So much of it is told through internal dialog. Do you have a narrator? How is it possible?
Plus, Orson Wells is dead.
And he is the only true figure capable of playing Baron Vladimir.
Who is going to do it now?
Actually yeah, I wouldn’t be against that, really.
Another question: can they get away with the evil fat guy being a pederast?
Maybe they could have Kevin Spacey play Baron Vladimir lol.
Jailbait Chloe Grace Moretz from a few years ago is how I picture Alia.
But she’s 21 now and has aged horribly.
Another thing – I think just like you’re not allowed to have evil pederasts, you’re not allowed to have jailbait. Although I think Chloe was only 16 in the above picture, so maybe you are.
But I insist on Ed Harris playing the Emperor.
I don’t know though.
I’m not stoked on the idea.
I mean the whole book is really about eugenics and creating a master race to rule the universe. Yes, Paul uses a peasantry to overthrow the established order, but he himself is a product of eugenics using the peasantry to his own ends.
How can any aspect of this story be considered anything other than PROBLEMATIC in current year?