November 28, 2018
Ironically, her last name is “Liberty,” which is the very last thing she should have.
The list of things childless women won’t develop an insane, unnatural attraction to gets smaller by the second.
Although to be fair – a chandelier makes more sense than Syrian child refugees from Nigeria.
Breitbart News reported last year about a British woman who was engaged to a chandelier. Now, the Mirror reports that Amanda Liberty of Leeds, England, has a tattoo of her spouse-to-be, a chandelier she calls “Lumiere.”
“I couldn’t stop thinking about her and how beautiful she was — she has such a beautiful shape, and I could feel really amazing energy coming from her,” Liberty said last year. “Although I knew it would be tricky to get her home, I knew I needed to find a way to make her mine.”
IT’S A DYKE CHANDELIER!!!
Now, Liberty has a tattoo of “Lumiere” on her left arm. “I was excited to see the end result. Before I got it done I was very nervous about the needle, I’m not the biggest fan of them, but it wasn’t too nerve-wracking,” Liberty said.
Liberty identifies as “objectum sexual,” which means she is attracted to inanimate objects. She claims she first realized this after she fell in love with a drum kit at age 14.
But Liberty isn’t exactly a one chandelier kind of girl. “None of my chandeliers are jealous of each other, they understand that I love them all for all of their different personalities,” Liberty said in a 2017 interview. “For example, I love kissing and cuddling Lumiere, but I sleep with Jewel every night, as she is portable and very nice to cuddle.”
You know what else is portable and very nice to cuddle with?
CHILDREN, YOU WORTHLESS SKANK!
They’re literally the only reason you exist on the face of this planet.
You ever considered a couple of those?
Oh, and don’t think this crazy bitch is unique or something, no.
There’s plenty like her out there, and as you might have guessed, almost all of them are disgusting childless women:
“This time, she’s determined to consummate her marriage, at last.”
“I’m her Princess, she’s my Queen.”
“I want your fluids, I want your fluids, I want your fluids…”
There are a couple of men too – things that look superficially like men, at least – doing this, but they’re a clear minority.
“I love him to death.”
A reminder that these “people” have every right that you have, including the right to vote.
You live in a society where people like this and worse have the exact same say as you do on who should be president or prime minister, on sending other people to war, on who gets taxed and who gets welfare, on… Well, you get the idea.
I give it 20 years until marrying objects becomes law of the land in most of the Western world.
Stupider things have happened, so why not this?
The only real question is – will it be Britain or Sweden to start putting people in prison for being… Objectophobic, I guess?
Anyway, while writing this article, I just suddenly realized that I’ve always been deeply in love with alcohol, and I’m gonna go consummate in a big way right now.